On attachments

What was it that Jesus really meant when he said that the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to children? Surely he was not talking about the age of physical body, neither the amount of time we spent on earth.

Could it be that what he meant was degree to which we let our spirit live detached from the form we embody?

Attachments are a sure way to close the door to opportunities!

And just to make sure, there is a fundamental difference between the doors closed by the will of Higher power and those we close ourselves because we think we know better.

We attach to people, places, experiences, expectations as well as possibilities and results!

Attachments are thieves. They take our playfulness, spirit of curiosity and exploration, and inspiration for whatever it is we need to do with the time we chose here.

"Be open to everything and attached to nothing."

We all are spirits, living off the sense of freedom within a form we take. Knowing and experiencing that everyone of us is that freedom and not really a form which inevitably changes is living in the Kindgom of Heaven.

Attachments are everything that bounds our formless spirit to the form that is temporary and changing constantly. So how can we define ourselves, our hopes, and our life paths based on that which is visible to the world. 

Because as soon as the moment passes, if attached to it, our spirit experiences grief, loss, jealousy, emptiness, loneliness, disconnectedness...when it should feel gratitude, expansion, and contentment. 

Separation is not part of the deal with the Universe!

So far, I met two men in my life who left me feel more loved and less attached to that love at the same time, their approach nurtured the freedom of my spirit. And I met them both for only a day. They left, I left, and we all allowed the other to take what they needed without the need to hold on to it. Love is expansion! And leaving is part of that for us to realize it fully!

These days we call these realizations MIRACLES!

"Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love.

Miracles are natural. When they don't occur something has gone wrong.

Miracles represent freedom from fears.

A miracle is never lost!"

A Course in Miracles

PS. personally, this is my greatest lesson so far and greatest joy to my spirit!

On honesty

What is honesty? Speaking ... truth? A truth or the truth? Do I truly know the difference? 

Could it be that the honesty is living - speaking, thinking, acting - from the place of love? 

It is said that if you think, speak, and act from this place within, people are irresistibly drawn to you. It does not necessarily mean they like you or agree with you. Quite the opposite, honesty can have very sharp edges and cut right through the "flesh". Honesty, however, brings people together, heals, and liberates just as much.

The wrong idea we still carry about honesty is that it is all about telling one another "the truth", expressing our own opinions, being assertive when it comes to our own needs and expectations. Sure, it is a part of that but there is much more left unnoticed.

Honesty, the living from the place of love, knows no other destination than the heart of the other.  Honesty is uncovering, healing, and connecting...of hearts.

And it always starts with you! It is up to you to uncover what you have been hiding, to heal the pain and discomfort, to connect without the need to claim the connection from others. All that happens in your own heart and no one needs to know about that. You don't have to tell anyone, you don't have to explain anything or change anything you do on a daily basis. The change will follow most likely but it is not the initial step you need to take. Change will take care of itself!

It was the second day we didn't have to walk, Sunday, May 19th 2013, and we were staying at my friend's place in Santiago de Compostella. I knew I would be walking again on Monday. I told Peter that my "temple" is waiting for me by the ocean. I was also hoping I wouldn't have to walk there alone and yes, I wanted Peter to keep me company on my way. I felt comfortable with him and he still had something to teach me...

"I am all for honesty in relationships but there are times when you need to tell a white lie anyway." I told him when we had one of those lengthy philosophical discussions about life and stuff.

"Why would you need to tell a white lie?" He replied.

Until then I had my reasons, my experiences, and wounds that made me think that white lies are inevitable and even helpful from time to time. But now, I was not so sure anymore. In fact, I suddenly saw how an important lesson he had to teach me there.

"Whatever it is you have to say, when you have to say it, when you know it can hurt the other person, start with what's more important than anything else you are about to say. Start with I love you. It makes all the difference." He said finally. 

It makes all the difference!

Dr. Sue Johnson talks and writes about a reason people get divorced, the number one reason relationships don't last. She says that it is all about losing the connection and about that deep longing for the connection at the same time. We feel lonely in relationships way too often! 

We feel lonely because we are not honest with our own hearts and with others.

"You want to take me to a movie? I asked.

Well, not really," he said. "What I really want is for you to be my girlfriend. But I thought saying that might scare you off." 

Sarah Dessen - from the book What Happened to Goodbye

On fear

Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here.

Marianne Williamson

How could I write about fear without referring back to A Return to Love? The book about miracles, a beautiful reminder of a little shift in perception needed to experience heaven on Earth.

And that shift is made when we decide to live from the place of love instead of fear. 

Fear is a huge topic that I can't even aim to cover in one short post. And so is Love. Frankly, I wanted to write about love. Deep inside, I feel like writing about love every week as I sit down with my notes and ideas. And in a way I do write about it and its many many forms. I write about life.

What drives our fears, where do they come from and why do they stay with us for so long?

I used to be a very fearful person. Now, looking back, I believe it was all meant to be for me to learn a lot about love actually. I feared change, unknown, unexpected, uncomfortable. And one by one, I was given an opportunity to experience them all so that I could understand how weak excuse a fear is in the end. Fear indeed is just a mist blurring our vision but there is nothing really to it if you decide to walk through it.

Fear is all about separation, scarcity, inability. Separation from God, source, love and one another. Scarcity in what we need, want and desire. Our own inability to create the life we came here to experience and share. If we learn, remember, the oneness of all that is, abundance that is always present, and our own ability to love and be loved, we have no other choice but forgive those who hurt us, embrace what scares us, smile at the world as it is, and take the responsibility to do what we know we can without excuse or apology.

When you shift your attention from yourself to others with an open heart, you start noticing beautiful connections that exist at any moment of your life. 

...I keep thinking why we turned love into something we are ashamed to talk about, and even worse, express. Being able to perceive and give love in whatever form it can take became something that makes us feel small and weak. Isn't that the greatest courage after all?

Camino Called Life

So, here it is, I did end up writing about love after all. In fact, I am not sure one can understand and overcome fear without welcoming love in the process. I guess the greatest fear we hold is not seeing love for what it really is; oneness, abundance, ability to see ourselves (and let others see us) as we are. 

"Don't forget you can change anything you want! You are not what you have learned to be." said Manuel with the last hug and a gentle kiss on my cheek that morning. My eyes were filled with tears and my heart with love and hope. What he said that morning has stayed with me since then; the little insignificant act of love, the seed of change watered and slowly growing within. Camino Called Life

We learned to fear but that's not who we are! Life doesn't come with fear but it does come from love.

The only thing you regret in the end is falling for someone's definition of love instead of exploring its infinite potential. It is, not saying "I love you" to people who should have heard it from you. Camino Called Life

On feminine

I do not aspire to define feminine in one post. In fact, I am glad it is not even possible. 

Next week, with a full moon in Capricorn, I will be closing my "old year" and so it is a good time to look back, clean what's needed and fully embrace what was learned. 

Even if you are not a Capricorn, full moon is a beautiful time for anyone to celebrate the completion, fullness of life that manifests itself every month just to slowly disappear again. 

Any clearing is a decision we make. A decision on what to keep and what to let go of. 

Ideally it is not one or another. Let go of what no longer serves you, keeps you from moving forward, but also consciously choose something you want in your life more present and alive.

I chose femininity. 

There is a lot one can write about femininity, definitions, opinions and perspectives, but the fact is, it sure is a shadow work.

I don't even know how to share what I have learned about it myself but I will try anyway (as usual).

If you are a woman, try to think about the things I write here during the week, see if/how you can find them enriching, what the difference is between your inner intuitive understanding and "reality". And most of all, observe your own femininity, notice the beauty of all that comes with it.

And if you are a man...Well, try to see women for who they are instead of what they learned to be, forgot to be, chose to be for whatever reason. 

Without too much explanation (I don't want to spoil your own observation), here is what I learned about being feminine. And let me focus on just a few points today.

Feminine energy is passive.

Feminine energy is intuitive.

Feminine energy is receptive.

I am 31 but never before I heard the story of conception more beautiful than the one about a golden egg. It is the most natural and fascinating story of life and yet I missed one part of it every time I heard it. 

As a woman, your body produces one egg every month (not a million..."just in case to get there"). When the time is right (and it is not your mind in charge of that), it is released and travels down to your uterus where it "nests". What you nurture for a month is released yet it never leaves your body (as long as there is a potential, so again, why holding on to something what's not giving you life). It is your golden egg. It is your essence. For now. You were made to receive in the first place.

Yet too often, we give away the treasure recklessly, leaving ourselves depleted, feeling not enough, incomplete. 

If you seek wholeness outside, you only find guilt and disappointment.

Passive is not lazy. It is still. Passive is the bearer of peace.

Intuitive is not about randomness and chaos but deep knowing and trust.

Receptive is not selfish. It is understanding that what we keep from ourselves, we keep from others. 

Feminine and masculine are a little bit like black and white. Technically, they are not even colours. They both contain the full spectrum of colours (all that is needed for creation) and still seem so different. Life emerges from their union. Life meets them in between...

We need to let ourselves be who we are...

...And let men be men - active, analytical, and giving! 

On trust

Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6

It is a little bit difficult for me to write this week. I can't really tell why but I guess it has something to do with the lesson I am learning at the moment. It is very intimate, personal, and hard to put in words. I am learning to trust, to accept the unknown, being content with one step when I would like to see the whole staircase.

As hard as it is to trust, there is one great thing about it. Trust is the source of inner peace. And the inner peace is knowing that no matter what is being seen, felt of experienced at the moment, there is a greater force working behind the scenes. The force working on your behalf, working for you.

We are always given all that we need, nothing more and nothing less. Our part in the deal is to do as much as we can with it. Sure, it is easy when the things go well but we need to pay just as much attention and love to the moments that challenge us.

I had one of those nights this week when I woke up before dawn again and couldn't go back to sleep. I got up, sitting in the darkness and breathing in the crispy morning air that was coming in through the open door. And there it was again. It had happened a couple of times before, the words started to fill my mind randomly and I couldn't help but take a pen and paper to jot them down. I found myself writing about trust!

Trust is taking a brick that fell on your toe and building a house from it. When together their existence makes sense but you decide to see it in every single one as well.

And you see your walls now in the colours of your experiences!

Many, including myself, talk about breaking down the walls of separation but this week I looked at those same walls from a different perspective. Just like with everything else, the intention is the key.

We can build the walls to protect ourselves, hide behind them, or we can build a shelter, a lighthouse for others. 

The shift happens when you trust that your current experience/situation is all that you need today to be able to move forward tomorrow.

Trust is not easy at all. In fact, it is more difficult for me than anything else. However, it helps me see the world more connected, life less disappointing, and hardships more meaningful. And don't let others tell you it is just a passive acceptance of what is. It actually sharpens your senses, makes you feel more alive, and teaches you about gratitude like nothing else I can think of.

I learn to trust again and just a thought of it fills me with peace and joy at the same time.

"Trust is to human relationships what faith is to gospel living. It is the beginning place, the foundation upon which more can be built. Where trust is, love can flourish. " Barbara Smith

On Courage

"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go." T.S.Eliot

We had summer solstice this week and in old traditions it basically means the time of year when the energies peak, the light is revealed and strongest, and our own strength cumulates.

As a woman, I could compare it to ovulation. Ovulation is the phase of the cycle when hormones, energy, confidence reach the top and make it possible to create a new life. All is aligned in favor of creation. Summer solstice then, is the time when we may feel and experience a similar strength, energy  or courage to take a leap of faith, step into unknown, go beyond our own limitations. Somehow we are better equipped around that time and fueled by the light, we don't focus on the dark side of the issue as much as we tend when the light is scarce.

Such was the week I experienced, the week when I did and said things I didn't even think I could.

 

Courage is a common denominator of any change.

It is a little shift in the way you do things, a slightly different approach or just an impression that you follow through. Courage is not a big, elaborate expression. At least not in my experience. It was always that one little act or thought that gave birth to something great much later.

Look at it not as a drop in the ocean but rather as a spark in a haystack! 

Long time ago I heard one theory and this week I heard it again from my friend. If you feel an urge to do something, an inspiration, impulse, you have to act on it within 20 seconds or so. You have to do anything to "materialize" it otherwise the spark dies out. 

If you feel like helping the person in front of you, do it. And if you don't know how, just ask if there is anything you can do for them. 

If you see a piece of rubbish on the ground and the feelings of uneasiness or compassion for the world we live in rise up, pick it up and throw it into the bin yourself. 

If you like the guy sitting next to you on the bus, smile or just compliment his shoes. :-)

Do any little thing you can at the moment of "inception". Don't analyze it beforehand.

That little spark is the courage that may ignite something greater. 

"Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point." C.S.Lewis

And so to share with you a little bit of my own experience this week, en-couraged by the light that came with the solstice, here is where it took me.

I was able to say I was lonely to a friend (I actually never said that out loud before and now I am even sharing it with the world).

I was curious to play with miracles (and I found out that the less attached you are to the result, the faster they manifest in your life. And they did!)

I asked for guidance and mentoring and expressed my desire to learn more in the field (and I mean I literally said to the person "please, teach me!").

I asked for a help.

I approached a person who might teach me about love (a person I never met or talked to before - that's actually the top of my courage this week, especially since love is the thing that can make me vulnerable again).

This is the spark that does not necessarily make sense in the beginning. The spark that might be difficult to be expressed. But if you play with it, direct it by acting upon it, you may experience incredible things and maybe save yourself from a fire that would burn you otherwise in some other way.

Try the 20-second theory this week and see how it makes you feel or where it takes you.

Courage used to be a virtue. Now it seems to be something long forgotten. We forget a piece of it every time we fail to notice our own beating heart.

The word courage comes from old Latin word cor which means heart, the seat of emotions and life. For me, courage is taking a step forward despite the risk of losing something. As you take that step, you most likely lose a piece of your ego in return for your heart - a living beating heart. Here is to the fullness of the life we long for!

                                                                                                                              Camino Called Life

On failing

"We grow and leave the places we call homes. And then, we try to recreate those places from our memories and experiences, hoping to make it work for us again. I thought I had it. I had worked hard on making it work and looked for all the ingredients necessary. Yet I had failed without understanding why, and I kept failing." Camino Called Life

This week I could add "and I keep failing again".

There are easy weeks when everything seems to flow effortlessly and then there are weeks when you can't find a way to make it work, to move forward when things didn't work out, to get into grips with the purpose and meaning of it all.

Everything around me is changing. People move on, start new businesses or have babies and I was somehow forced to realize (maybe more than ever) that despite the wonderful dreams and goals I have for my life, despite the never-ceasing pursue of my calling, despite being fully aware and proud of the journey I started three years ago, despite it all, there are times when I feel empty, lost or alone.

I got to the point in my life when I wouldn't be able to put aside what I have learned. And at the same time, I see that is not enough, that is not the end. There is still more to learn and lots to build.

Whatever you learn, especially that which you learn through pain and failure, is a part of your appointment! It is then when you start to see oneness instead of separation, and when love outgrows fear.

Finally, I need to stop punishing myself for the mistakes I did in the past because I didn't know better, for the times I hurt those I love with the decisions I had to make, for the love I couldn't give because I didn't have it myself. I won't be able to move on unIess I start receiving, with love! That's it; receive with love!

What if the mistakes, the failures, the obstacles are blessings in disguise? What if they are even more than that? What if they are the key to unlocking your full potential, letting the perfect Divine break through the imperfect form? 

"God turns the mess in our lives to our message!" Joel Osteen

Yes, this week, I temporarily lost the land from my sight, I was left swimming in cold waters for life, alone, helpless. But you know what? Deep down, the spark, the flame didn't die out and that made all the difference. That's the light we don't chose to get, that's the appointment we receive to bear the fruits that will last, and it will get us through it all if we don't ignore it. And it will get us through better off than we were before.

Receive the experiences, the failures, the LOVE this world offers you along the way! 

"The Soul within our individual souls loves the one who runs and falls down more than the one who sits and watches." Rumi