It is not that we can heal ourselves but rather that we are willing to accept the healing.
It is also true that healing is, in its essence, coming back to oneself and oneness. These two are of the same nature after all, love and light.
And let me tell you, once you find the light within, nothing will be able to hide it again, not even you, because the force behind it is stronger than anything else.
As strange as it may sound, it is the person who needs healing that does not allow it to happen most of the time.
The Course in miracles teaches us that the process of healing can be so painful that we tend to give it up too soon or even avoid it. We need courage to accept healing and we need to surrender to whatever it takes in order to be healed. But we need to approach healing conscious and awake!
"The truth is like a scalpel because it is painful to open our wounds and uncover all of the lies....there is no other way but forgiveness to clean the wounds of all the poison...there is no other medicine but unconditional love. That is the healing. Three simple points: the truth, forgiveness and love." Don Miguel Ruiz
Marianne Williamson writes in her book A Return to Love that even if we offer the "problem" to God and by doing so allow the healing, He can't bring light into that which we keep hiding.
The truth, forgiveness, and love! You start with yourself and then you will be given as many teachers/partners/encounters as you need to be healed. We came to live on the planet with other human beings, living beings and the living world itself. We came to place and time that is most beneficial for us and for others as well. We came here to fulfill the purpose with the tools we have, not with what we need to acquire. We just need to remember that. We need to heal ourselves first in order to heal others.
And this is the ultimate purpose - healing for everyone, coming back to the Source after the separation long time ago, understanding that we have been One all the time.
Your partner, parents, kids, friends, they are all here to heal you, treat them accordingly! And don't judge them just because it hurts sometimes. Maybe they are just opening another wound of yours. And you may be just opening the space for miracles.